Tuesday, November 28, 2006

Until our shells simply cannot hold all our insides in, and that's when we explode

I am skipping class today. This is somewhat momentous, as it is sculpture class, which I have only really skipped twice, and because we are doing something new in that class today, and I have never skipped that class when we're doing something new. But it is cold and snowy outside, I have a sore throat, I am exceedingly tired, there was a humongous pile of dishes that needed doing, the bathroom was horribly messy, the trash needed to be taken out, there's a super-secret project that needs finishing really really really soon, and I really wanted to make tomato lentil soup for dinner. So, thus, I'm skipping class. I will email my teacher about it a bit later, as well as emailing my drawing teacher about not having gone to class for the last two weeks. That'll be fun. Tomorrow I'm getting my guts up and going back to that class again, which will also be fun. Hopefully the traffic won't be too bad.

The exceedingly tired part of the many reasons for skipping class today is because it was too warm last night, and I slept horribly. Ironic, isn't it, that I finally figure out how to turn the furnace on, and then it promptly decides that it ought to be five degrees warmer than what we had set it to, and keeps me up for half the night? I got up at about 3am after sleeping with just the sheet until that point, and turned it down several degrees, which made it bearable to sleep. Today, I figured out how to set it to auto, which I'm hoping will actually work and it will turn itself on when our apartment starts getting cold.

I also had an eyelash stuck in the corner of my eye for the majority of the day today. I didn't manage to get it out until I got home. It made it very hard to concentrate while I was at work, especially since my eyes were already feeling rather dried out from lack of sleep and the dry, dry air. I may never understand why the air suddenly gets so very much drier every time it precipitates here.

The dishes are all done, the lentils are cooked, the soup will hopefully be done in not too long, and then I will eat, and hopefully my spirits will be lifted considerably with the return of sugar to my bloodstream. Skipping class, in many ways, is nice, but in many other ways, it makes me very stressed out and prone to depression, which I have been trying to combat since deciding not to go today.

I have been craving desserts lately.

We tried Zupas restaurant for dinner last night. I had curried butternut squash and apple soup, which was alright (not nearly enough curry in it, in my opinion), and a blueberry maple salad which was quite tasty, though a little too sugary by the end. I am convinced that I could make everything which they have on their menu at home, and with a little experimentation make it all much tastier. It didn't help their case that all of their employees save one seemed to be completely new and had no idea what they were doing.

I had a dream last night that I was pregnant, and went into the hospital, had a brief sharp pain and out popped a very fat and happy baby boy, that I couldn't nurse for various reasons, so I picked him up and walked home with him, and he was very cute, and didn't cry at all, and was very fat, and I was happy. When I woke up though, thinking back over the dream, it was very weird. I feel like my motherly instincts are starting to kick in though, as I've been wanting to spend time cooking and cleaning and organizing and sewing and redecorating and every Sunday the past month I have come home from church desperately wanting a baby, for a variety of reasons. I guess I'm 23, approaching 24, and am feeling very ready to move into the mommy stage of life. We'll see how things go though. It's just something I've been thinking about a lot lately.

I am very hungry now, and Veng has agreed to assist me with the soup-making, so more updates later sometime.

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